Chapter 17: (Non-Sponsored Chapter)

“Arn??” Jackson said.

“Do you know him?” asked the Watchmaker.

“Yes. Well, I mean, I did. We went to school together. A long time ago.”

The Watchmaker studied him. “I see, well hopefully you got along,” he said optimistically.

“I hope so too!” said Jackson, using both words and tone that did not make much sense to either of them.

Jackson collected himself. “Mr. Watchmaker, I know you want me to do this. And I appreciate you trying to help. But I just don’t think I’m cut out for it.” He slid the card back across the table. “I’m sure Arn would do much better with someone else. Anyone else.”

The Watchmaker picked up the hourglass and laid it on its side, stopping the grains from falling.

The Watchmaker studied Jackson with his enormous eyes. 

“You have done so much already Jackson. The fact that you’re here at all speaks to just how capable and brave you are.”

“It’s all because of Tarza!” Jackson interrupted.

“I have no doubt she was nothing short of superb. There’s a reason she was trusted with such an important mission. But she believes in you too. It’s easy to see. No,” said the Watchmaker, “yours is not a problem of abilities, it’s perhaps a problem of confidence. Or maybe… motivation.”

He turned the clock around on his desk so that Jackson could see it.

“It is time for you to hear the story of my home planet, Uldon…”

It was twenty years ago. A great deal of time for a human, but barely a moment for an Uldonite like me. 

Ours was a planet of prosperity. Wildlife flourished. Our bright sun provided us with all the power we needed. And the rivers of liquid ulderite gave us the materials to provide some of the greatest mechanical advancements that our solar system, and beyond, had ever seen. But there was something else we had… salt water. Like your planet, more than half of our surface was covered with it. I, too, know the taste of the delicious salt-water wabanza fish. Although, judging by your face, it seems that perhaps this was not a delicacy on Earth? Well, all the same, we have a shared history, you and I, in our ocean-covered planets. It is my hope that we do not have a shared fate.

For, one sunny day, an official-looking cohort touched down on the shores of our largest city, Iridia. They wouldn’t say what planet they had come from or who they represented, only that they needed readings from our oceans for scientific studies. As a supporter of science, our mayor was all too eager to comply. Of course, a generous donation to his campaign didn’t hurt either. 

They took samples from the sea, and were off before we knew it. No one had time to even ask what exactly it was that interested them about our water. Three more times they came back, landing on three more shores. They have to be sure that the water meets their standards, they said, for the study. By the fifth time they came down to our planet, our leaders demanded a conference. No donation would assuage them this time. But you see, Jackson, as is often the case in ill-fated cases of sinister plots, the alarm was sounded too late. The visitors had already gotten all the information they needed. There would be no conference. 

Not only had they studied our water, but they had also analyzed our defenses. I am proud to say that Uldon has one of the finest defense systems in existence. Our ulderite fortresses and bunkers are all but impenetrable. And when the skies were filled with a swarm of Sculpers coming down from the visitors’ ships, we were already safe inside, watching, as they… I can tell from your expression again that you do not know what Sculpers are. To be honest, we were not very familiar with them either. Our scholars had only read of them in the Comprehensive Compendium of Creatures from U U of U Press, and even then only retained a few memorable facts. Firstly, they have home planets all across the galaxy, but mostly keep to themselves. And each Sculper, on each planet, has their own unique color combination of scales. And I can attest that under any other circumstances, a sky filled with Sculpers, in an array of glistening colors, would be a most welcome and exciting sight. They’re also known for being gullible creatures. For many centuries, Sculpers have been the favorite targets of intergalactic scammers. They can be easily tricked into giving away their personal color codes, which is their most valuable and important piece of identification. Lastly, and most importantly on that fateful day, they each have an expandable beak that can hold up to 36 slurps of water. Ah right… 36 slurps would translate to, hold on a moment… roughly 10 gallons of liquid on Earth. 

Had they attacked our fortresses, had they come for our ulderite, or our crops, or our vast wealth, our defenses would have been ready. And might I add, we would have made short work of them, too. But, it seems, we Uldonites had never planned on someone coming for our seas. So all we could do was watch as the countless Sculpers descended upon our oceans with open beaks, then flew away with our salt water. Thousands upon thousands of cargo spaceships hovered low and began carting it away. It had been the visitors’ plan all along. And it had worked. They had stolen our salt water and left only the fresh. It wasn’t until their final dip, when there was little more than puddles left, that a group of our leaders made an expedition to confront the Sculpers. My grandmother, the Official Clockmaker of Uldon, was one of the members of the small expedition.

The Sculpers, for their part, were shocked to find that the planet had any inhabitants at all. Knowing that we would be lying in wait in our ulderite bunkers, out of sight, the visitors had lied to the Sculpers, and told them that Uldon was abandoned. They convinced the Sculpers that there was another planet in desperate need of Uldon’s salt water. And, being the charitable creatures that they are, they felt obliged to help with their uniquely-suited beaks. 

The Sculpers apologized when they realized their mistake (and have since become great friends to the Udlonites). But the damage had been done. The visitors had left with the water, at the first sign of the Uldonite expedition.

When my grandmother asked the Sculpers who it was that brought them to us… When she asked who the visitors were, and who they worked for, she could not believe the reply. 

“Who?” asked Jackson, who had been holding his breath for the last 7 seconds without realizing. 

“They were a scouting team for Those in Charge,” said the Watchmaker.

Now Jackson was breathing much too quickly.

“But, why would they- how does that- what do you—” attempted Jackson.

The Watchmaker raised and lowered his hands.

“I’ll answer as best I can. After they stole our salt water I left Uldon to find out all that I could about Those in Charge. I traveled the universe gathering intel. And along the way, I formed a team of the most impressive and skilled agents I could find. They would become the founding members of the Pocket Watches. We tracked the comings and goings of Those in Charge for many years, and we uncovered plots and schemes of a starling nature. But none loomed larger than this: they have been stealing the salt water from each and every planet that has it.

Sculpers from all over the universe had been tricked into helping them, many times with many lies. And it had worked on Uldon, but never again after. You see, as we learned about their operation, we found ways to fight back. Their scouting party could barely touch down on a planet before we warned them of their intentions. And we made sure that any Sculpers within a hundred-planet-distance knew not to fall for their tricks. And to say this made them angry… would be an understatement.”

“Is that why you’re hiding here on Ridgea?” asked Jackson, knowing the answer. 

The Watchmaker nodded. “We’ve taken extraordinary measures to remain hidden and safe, and they’ve taken extraordinary measures to try and find us.”

“So what does this have to do with–”

“I’m getting to that,” said the Watchmaker. “As their old methods stopped working, Those in Charge knew they had to find new approaches… approaches like capturing presidents of planets to find out their defenses, instead of using scouts. And building a machine that could steal an entire planet’s salt water.”

“Like a Third Generation Macro-Electro-Bionic-Hydroxy-Gravitational Tube Ray,” said Jackson. “They started using the Byzongs to help them!”

“Precisely. Without Sculpers, they needed a new class of alien to help them. And Byzongs were the perfect mark. After all the money they had lost, there was no need to trick them, they could be easily bought.”

“Not all of them,” said Jackson.

The Watchmaker smiled. “That’s right. And thank goodness for Tarza. Not only is she a gifted agent and mechanic, she also has intimate knowledge of the Byzong operation. I dare say she’s our most valuable asset.”

Jackson bristled, ever-so-slightly, at the mention of Tarza as an “asset”. Asset, you see, is a word usually reserved for things. And Jackson didn’t like when words used for things were used for people. But asset can also be used when referring to spy as well and, even Jackson had to admit, Tarza was, without a doubt, a spy. He just hoped she was not a double agent. Or a triple agent. Although he was increasingly unsure if those existed.

“Jackson… Earth was, and is, the last planet on their list. Once they have your salt water they’ll have everything they need to carry out their plan. And now it seems they’ve found that your President can be bought as well. So there will be no one to stop them, unless a new President is elected. One who understands the gravity of the situation, and who will do whatever it takes to protect their planet.”

“But that’s not me! I don’t understand the gravity of the situation! I mean, I know it’s bad if they take our salt water. I mean, it sounds really bad even when I say it… But I still have no idea what they want it for!” Jackson said, exasperated.

Before the Watchmaker could answer, Tarza burst into the room.

“I’m so sorry to interrupt, but we need to get Jackson to Earth. President Racha has scheduled the debate for three hours from now.”

The Watchmaker placed the hourglass upright again. He reached into a drawer and slid a Warp-port across the table to Jackson.